Another pixel, another thought

Before this, I actually wanted to write about how messed up my life has been – from school to relationships to friends to work to dreams and other stuff – and how short life is to bother about whether anybody likes you or that you like someone and having to be with them. But, hey, seriously, life is too damn short to be spending it with someone else I intend to spend it all to myself and hopefully my riches. If only it were that easy.

So anyway, I just decided not to elaborate on that life mumbo-jumbo in here ’cause it’s played in my head over and over already. Instead, here’s my second pixel art of Scar’s archenemy, Omen.

The 8th Grade

Anant Shiva to me – February 15, 2007/via Gmail

I think you’ll be interested in this man. why not get involved?

http://www.lifeofmann.com/index.html

here’s the first chapter

http://www.lifeofmann.com/story01.html

here’s the Faq and About section:

http://www.lifeofmann.com/faqs.html

http://www.lifeofmann.com/about.html

Update on prologue…and something more

Well, yesterday I met up with Ali to check up on the progress of the prologue. So far, he’s done the initial sketches up to page four if I remember correctly and we finally went over to design Arqatrian’s Watcher form. It looks good as a rough and I’m sure it’ll look even better as a promotional render.

Afterwards, Ali apparently wanted to muse about his life. Turns out I’m not the only one having a rough time. He’s really burdened by the thought of money, security, the future. I guess everyone at this age does think about that. Almost everyone. The rich punks don’t need to worry about those things for sure. As for me, no job, no money and no honey. Life has been really dry and sucky and the cast on my hand ain’t helping. I was kinda happy for Ali to know that he’s got a great gal with him and she’s willing to wait and they’ve talked about the future together and even marriage.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not really into marriage right now. Actually, I don’t think I’m even into any relationship right now ’cause I seriously don’t think I’m fit and ready to provide for anyone on any level. Ali asked me when I’m gonna be attached and I told him not anytime soon. Seriously, nobody I meet nowadays are up to my standards and unfortunately I haven’t got to meet a lotta women since my poly years.

But you know what’s the scariest thing is?

I’ve actually realized this thing about me quite a long time ago, but I think I’ve only recently come to terms with it. I think I’ve been alone too long that I’m used to it and I don’t think I’d give up my space for anyone anytime soon. I mean, adding to the fact that I had a real bad experience with the Bride of Chucky…I just don’t seem to be able to trust women at all. I know I go by the mantra DTA – Don’t Trust Anyone. But there’s a gauge in my trusting capability. For guys it’s easier. But for women…

I’ve heard so many bad things that women do to my friends and to other people and my own experience with them is a firm assurance of my perception of them.

I dunno. I have trust issues, I get that. I’m superficial, I’m a wreck, I’m pessimistic, I have a personality disorder and I keep wanting that one girl that got away, so badly, that sometimes, I can love and hate her at the same time.